“My adopted grandmother died when I was in my final year of high school, about 20 years ago. She was in the hospital for the year and wasn’t lucid. It helped me that she was still around physically, although not mentally, as it gave me time to get used to her being gone. I still get teary over the last time I spoke to her. We left her house, and I said, ‘See you tomorrow.’ And I thought in my head, I should say ‘I love you’. But I was already in the car and thought…no, I will see her tomorrow. She had a stroke that night and never fully recovered. I know she knew I loved her, but it still pains me deeply that I didn’t tell her that last time I saw her before her
stroke.

I say ‘I love you’ to family, and even friends, way too often, just in case it’s my last time. I have dreams about her still. I miss her deeply. She wasn’t just an adopted grandmother. She was my second mom. It’s so hard for me to write about; the loss still pains me.”

~Julia