As the autumn leaves turn and the holiday season approaches, many of us feel a poignant mix of emotions. Holidays bring festive cheer but also highlight the grief we endure for those whose physical presence is no longer with us. For example, Thanksgiving, with its focus on gratitude, and Christmas and Hanukkah, emphasizing family and togetherness, can magnify feelings of absence and longing.

When society’s messages about family and joy don’t match our own experiences of grief, it can feel overwhelming. The constant reminders on TV, social media, and in stores might only intensify feelings of sadness, especially if you’re without family or close friends during this time. The usual holiday cheer only serves to highlight the emptiness you’re feeling.

Grief support centers and organizations offer tips for handling the holidays, each trying to provide a fresh perspective. While some advice might seem repetitive, the reason behind it is apparent: the holidays are deeply intertwined with family, joy, and togetherness. For those grieving, these ideals can make the season feel even more isolating and challenging.

It’s important to acknowledge these feelings rather than try to suppress them. The holidays can amplify our grief, making it a challenging time. But instead of avoiding these emotions, embracing them can be a powerful way to honor and remember those who have gone before us. Grief, after all, is a testament to the love we continue to hold for our person.

Rather than forcing yourself into a festive spirit that doesn’t fit, it’s important to honor your journey through grief. Here are three things to keep in mind as you navigate the holidays:

• Take Care of Yourself: Grief can be exhausting, and the holiday season often intensifies it. Find small ways to care for yourself, whether through quiet moments of reflection, enjoying a favorite book, or indulging in a comforting activity. Self-care is essential during this time.

• Please Don’t Isolate: As the weather gets colder and social events feel more taxing, it’s tempting to withdraw. However, reaching out to supportive friends, family, or support groups can offer comfort and connection. You don’t have to go through this alone.

• Do What Is Right for You: The holidays can bring many well-meaning but unhelpful suggestions. Focus on what feels best for you and set aside suggestions that don’t align with your needs. You have the right to navigate your grief in your way.

While these tips may not solve all your holiday challenges, they’re meant to help you find what works for you and create a space where your grief can coexist with the season’s experiences. Remember, you’re not alone. Many others are walking this path alongside you, and together, we can find ways to honor and remember those who are no longer with us in physical presence during the holidays.

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