Things I Didn’t Lose to Grief

Grief took a lot.

It took the version of the future
I thought was guaranteed.
It took the sound of your voice existing in real time.
It took the ease of before.

But here is what it did not take:

It did not take my laugh.
It sounds different now, but it still rises.

It did not take my softness.
If anything, it made it braver.

It did not take my ability to love.
It stretched it.
Deepened it.

Made it more deliberate.

It did not take my memories.
They arrive when they want to — unannounced, sometimes inconvenient, always precious.

It did not take the way I say your name in my head.
Or the way I still talk to you when no one is around.

It did not take the parts of me you helped shape.

It did not take the lessons, or the inside jokes, or the small rituals no one else knows about.

It did not take you completely.

Because love does not evaporate.
It changes form.
It moves.
It settles into the marrow.

Grief took a lot.

But it did not take everything.

And some days, that is enough.

Written by: Victoria Villada-Lopez

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