Princess

My constant little companion for over 13 years.  She was supposed to be my daughters dog but that didn’t quite work out.  We had a big wind storm in the Dallas/Fort Worth area.  It blew down all the fences in our neighborhood.  A day or so later I was mowing the lawn and hear this dog just barking at me from the only part of the fence still standing and that was the gate into the back yard.  I thought to myself, what the heck kind of dog is barking at me in my own yard.  So I stopped what I was doing and opened the gate and there she was.  Monster from the snout, snarling barking, teeth baring ,wiggly tail wagging cutie and I was in love.  Well she was an anxious dog and playing hard to get.  My daughter who knew who the dog belonged to helped me with the aid of treats and promises of belly scratches finally coaxed her into the house.  Well, me being the responsible one decided we must tell the owners that we found their dog and make sure she was returned to them.  Hand in hand and my daughter crying  and begging me to keep her, we went down to the neighbor’s house and before I could get a word out the mother, who was standing in the driveway with her 2 year old son put a finger to her mouth and walked up to us.  “Do you want to keep her” she whispered.  Taken aback I asked, “are you sure?”.  “Yes, we don’t want her” she replied.  Elated my daughter almost screamed in excitement but was chastened by the mother who had just offered us their puppy.  Well I said, “of course we will take her”.  From that moment she became a beloved family member.  In the end, Princess bonded to me and my instinct to protect and care for her bonded me to her.  The thing that made her so damned cute to me, that when I would move quickly through the room, she would try to cross her front legs across my foot and nibble my ankle most likely created a sea of drama with a small child in the house and ended with the fences being blown down and her getting out.  I think her original owners had had enough and as providence would have it she became our family dog.  As sad as her passing has made me and we are 5 weeks into this and I’m still crying, I am forever grateful for her presence, her little soul and her being.  She made me a better, more caring person.  Her paw came in yesterday.  That is why I’m doing this memorial.  I’m sure anyone who has never cared for a pet would not understand how I could still cry when alone and I catch that random memory on Facebook pic and its her.  Or in a moment I think about how empty the house is and how I miss her snuggling up in my lap and making me put up my computer so I could give her a scratch.  I feel guilt with the acknowledgment that her immediacy is starting to leave me and I struggle desperately to hold on to the memory of her silky fur and warmth of her in my lap.  She was here for all the ups and downs.  I organized a large portion of my life around her care.  I will miss her forever and I really wish I could just see her one more time greeting me at the door after a long hard day with that unconditional love she brought to me.    Goodbye flower,  my little miss wiggly you were a special dog and I will miss you.